I recently received a referral on a child who is 11 1/2 years old and in 5th grade. She was adopted from Guatemala after death of mother (age 4) and adopted out by paternal grandmother who felt she was no longer able to care for her and father couldn't afford to care for her. Came to US at age 7 1/2. Her adoptive mother has a child she adopted at birth, who is now 13 years old. Adoptive mother no longer wants this child, but is keeping the older sister. Mother reports this child is too clingy/needy, fights too much with her sister, needs reminders to do everything around the house, and has no friends. Mother lost both parents after she adopted this child and had a serious illness. School teacher and social worker say she is a great kid, has friends, is caring, some learning problems, some problems with being responsible and organized. They think the problem lies with mother. What would you make of this and how would you proceed? I have the option to meet with the mother, and eventually have some overnights with the child. I do not even want to consider overnights unless I am almost 100% sure I can accept this child into my life because I do not want her to experience another rejection from me. I would appreciate your insights/suggestions/advice. Thank you.
